This week was full of work. Close to 49 hours at the office. To top it off this was the week to review the proofs of the Hero Quest book. This pushed me and made me stronger in many ways. However, it did put me behind some of the goals that I set for each week.
My book for the week was Credibility. This book basically confirms the fact that if a leader has no credibility he is nothing and will not lead for long. I long to be a credible leader in all situations. Next week I have a great speaking engagement on Conflict Resolution. This is fairly exciting.
“That looks like Maddy’s toothbrush.I was wondering where it went.We already got a new one, thanks anyway.”
Carefully, John put the sink back together.“So where is your kids’ dad now?”
“About four months ago, Maddy started wetting the bed.It came on kind of suddenly.I was already miserable carrying around this baby, so lugging the sheets to the laundry mat nearly every day was exhausting.After it went on for a couple of months she became emotional and really out of control.One day she would eat like a horse and the next she would refuse to eat.I never know which little girl I would see in the morning, an angry girl or a weepy girl and I rarely got to see my happy daughter.Tyler didn’t want me to, but I found a counselor that would listen to us for free and it came out that Tyler was abusing her.I thought that I was going to kill him.He denied it, but something in me told me that it was true.That’s when we took off and came here.He still doesn’t know where to find us.I’m afraid that some day he will follow her bus home from school.”
John finished his work on the pipe and ran the water to make sure that the clog was indeed fixed.He watched it for a few moments, seeing no leaks, and the drain running smoothlyas he packed up his gear.“I don’t blame you for being afraid.But I can tell you this.Even if he figures out where you are, I know that God will protect you here.”The woman smiled.John walked past her.“I’ll be praying for your safety.”He stepped out into the sunlight and took a deep breath of fresh cold air.After crossing the parking lot he opened the lid to the dumpster and emptied the contents of the bucket.John just shook his head at the junk this world could produce.
Just a few blocks away from the Shelter, Sarah sat on the floor of a turn-of-the- century house.Clothing, food scraps, cigarette butts and papers were everywhere.The sound of cars racing by on the interstate meant that the television was turned up to decibel levels only found in nursing homes.Many years ago, the landlord had given up fixing the house since the State had been planning on claiming imminent domain and tearing down the house for the freeway expansion.On any given night about fifteen adults and seven children could be living in this dump.In the back room, a young would- be scientist worked on his latest brew of methamphetamines.
Sarah lit a cigarette and yawned loudly.Her hands were trembling but she could not tell at this point if it was her emotions or the drug use.In short order she had smoked three cigarettes and then looked around the room.“Who is that guy sleeping in the hallway?”
A scratchy voice from the lump on the couch answered her, “That’s my new boyfriend.I met him on the bus this morning.He said he wanted to marry me.I brought him here to meet my friends but you’re the only one that’s awake.”
“What time is it?”
“It’s only about .”The voice broke out into racking coughs.
“Where are my kids?” Sarah wondered aloud. She hadn’t heard Michelle, Susie or Little Anton around lately.
The whole conversation had a dreamy sort of tone as if none of it was really happening.Anyone watching the scene would have felt like they were watching a movie in slow motion.
Suddenly sunlight burst into the room and a menacing figure appeared and quickly shut and locked the door behind him.“What are you people doing in my house?”The two ladies sat up a bit and looked at the figure, trying to make out what they were seeing.Sarah’s face was filled with questions but none of them were spoken out loud.The figure stepped over a mound of debris and flipped on a light, exposing complete squalor.Light battled the gloom and revealed food wrappers, the floor obscured by rumpled clothing and other unidentifiable heaps. A listless curtain, torn and frayed, hung desperately from a crooked rod. The battered furniture was better suited for the dump, heaped ashtrays, sat nearby and spilled onto dirty dishes. Both women complained bitterly, not because of the housekeeping, but because of the light.They were not the only ones affected by the light, many people roused and moved from their burrows.
“Hey, Mike,” smiled a clean-cut looking man of nearly thirty as he threw Mike a beer.
Monday May 14:One of our guests moved out and on her way started bragging about the fact that she was going to go out using.This upset many of our guests who have been working at staying clean.
Tuesday May 15:Some of our phase II guests (5 pm-8am) were getting too comfortable.One refused to participate in shelter events and others refused to do the morning clean up.Those that are in rebellion now only have overflow (10pm-6 am) as an option.The rebellion has ended.One of our guests learned today that she is 6 months pregnant.This was shocking news and she is still processing.
Wednesday May 16:Quiet day.
Thursday May 17:One of our guests stated that she disagrees with the doctrine of the modules and small groups so would not be doing them.We let her know that Hope House has no such requirements so she went there on Friday.The building went into rebellion because I took the day off.2 washers went down, the computers went down and assorted tvs went down.It all came back up on Friday when I returned.One of our guests got a place and moved in and then decided around 11 pm that the place she just moved into was not safe.She has shown a pattern of this so we let her back into her room for Thursday night and then offered her overflow for the next week.
Friday May 18:The Friday small group is really growing and becoming popular.As a result the group going to MountSpokane is getting smaller.One of our guests made threatening remarks to guests (she is very sweet to staff) so she was moved to overflow.
Weekend:The Christian Motorcycle Association put on a wonderful Tea for the ladies at the shelter.Several ladies have been raving about the event and how it made them feel special.
General comments: Overall everything is running smoothly at the shelter.We have a new desk that was donated that looks incredible.Diane got it set up on Thursday and others on staff have worked to reorganize.We are starting to look very professional at the Crisis Shelter.
I feel really good about this week. Cara and I celebrated 15 years of marriage with a quiet afternoon lunch and walk through the park. I love to watch people and downtown Spokane gives you the opportunity of a lifetime. Everyone of the people walking by has a story and I enjoy thinking about what their story might be.
The book of the week was called Conflict Resolution for Dummies. This book took a bit to read but it gave me some ideas for my class that I will be teaching in June and is available to anyone who would like to get better at being a Peacemaker.
I felt good during my runs and I am feeling on top of things right now. I pray that God will use me to change the World!
The clogged sink was waiting for him. After knocking, John stood back a few steps.He smiled, holding the tools in his hands.This was another opportunity to be a hero - that was, if he succeeded, and with these old pipes that was not a guarantee.Most of the time with projects like this the only thing that was certain was that he would soon be on his way to the hardware store. The odds were that it would take more than one trip.A bleary-eyed looking woman answered the door. “I heard you had a clogged sink.”
“Yeah,” she said thickly. Slowly the woman stepped back.Clothes were strewn about and toys cluttered the room.Crusted food sat on a plate on the table, obviously from the night before.The room was darkened except for some light coming through the glass in the bathroom where John was heading.It was fairly obvious that the baby had recently loaded a diaper; at least he hoped it had been recently.Suddenly coming to her senses, the woman in an apologetic voice said, “The baby was up all night.I’m sorry for the mess.I really meant to have this cleaned up by now.I guess that I fell asleep after my daughter got off to school this morning.”
“That’s ok.I know that normally your room isn’t like this.” John stepped over a small pile of clothes and began dismantling the pipes under the sink.“What’s wrong with Ethan?”
“I don’t really know.It seems that every single time that he and his sister have visits with daddy he doesn’t want to go to sleep.”
“Court-ordered visits, I’m guessing?”
“Yeah, I wouldn’t let that jerk anywhere near my baby.”The woman began getting agitated just talking about it.“Can you believe that they gave him visitation?”
“I don’t really know him.” John replied mildly.
“You would have read about him in the papers.About ten years ago Tyler was put in jail for abusing a neighbor girl.”Words began to flow out of her like water from a faucet. “He did his time and when he got out I met him at church.He told me about what had happened and had me convinced that the little girl had made the whole thing up.I mean, he told me that at church, so he couldn’t be lying, could he?”She didn’t really pause to let John comment or answer, he listened as water poured out of the sink into the bucket.“Doesn’t really matter, I guess, because I believed him. Stupid me, I fell in love.I was raised in the church and always wanted a Christian man.We were waiting on his divorce to come through so that Tyler and I could be married.It was taking a long time so we moved in together to save a few bucks.That’s when Ethan came along.”She seemed to run out of words.
John pulled a toothbrush out of the sink along with large globs of hair.“I think I found the problem.Do you want your toothbrush back or do you want a fresh one?I can arrange that for you if you want.”John smiled.
Monday May 7:A long lost guest returned to the shelter after a several month disappearance.She has recently been in treatment and came to us directly from there.She looked great and seems ready for life change.One of our moms became aggressive using her therapy dog as a weapon when she did not get her way.The mom was asked to leave on Tuesday morning.
Tuesday May 8:One of our singles had a positive breathalyzer and then admitted that she had been drinking during most of her stay at the shelter.A young lady was dropped off at the administration wing of the mission while I was over there.The young lady was very drunk.I took her to the shelter and set her up to sleep it off for awhile.Several times she woke up not knowing where she was and volunteers and staff were able to calm her and help her feel loved.When she got to a point of detoxing where she had the shakes very bad, she opted to go to detox where they have medical help.Late in the evening one of our guests threw a bag over the fence to her boyfriend.When confronted by staff she became very aggressive.The confrontation became so heated that the guest was asked to leave.When she left the boyfriend and her began knocking on bathroom windows and making a racket.Police were called but the guest and her boyfriend had left before the police arrived.
Wednesday May 9:A young lady checked in today who was working diligently to reunite with her daughter who was recently taken from her by Child Protective Services.We made a few phone calls in order to help her make the contacts she needed since her actual CPS case was in Olympia.I am confident that there is more to the story there, but I don’t know what it is.She left on Thursday morning.
Thursday May 10:The young lady from Tuesday returned from Detox and is doing good.She stated that she still feels awful and embarrassed but the change in her was incredible.Guest assistants and Good Workers went to the UGM camp for a retreat.Diane and Jackie did most of the planning of the event and are leading the ladies in a time of fun, relaxation and devotion.
Friday May 11:One of our guests decided that she wanted to sleep in another guest’s bed since the other guest was at the retreat.We have had many discussions with this guest who not only wants a bottom bunk but one that does not have someone sleeping in the top bunk.I explained to her that she can not take up two beds.We had the conversation for three days and then let her know that overflow will always be a bottom bunk with no one above her and that would be her best option.
Weekend:The guest who had been here with the 25 year old son that we had accommodated several weeks ago went to the DV shelter from here.I find this frustrating because she is taking a bed in the DV program that should be used by someone who is actually in a DV situation.She had been safe here.
General comments: The ladies were blessed on Mother’s Day through many different donors and a nice table dinner in the parking lot.All of the ladies received gift bags, flowers and love from volunteers and staff.
This week I worked alot and lost momentum on my running. Eventually I will need to really pick it up if I wish to reach my goals. I also did a practice run on Heroic Conflict Resolution. I will need to do some adjustments but I enjoyed doing it. I also took Rachel to work with me this week. Working along side of my daughter felt very rewarding. She filmed portions of the Heroic Conflict Resolution class for me to add to my portfolio soon. She is busy editing the video.
I continued to read more about conflict resolution this week but the book that I finished was a new book by Lencioni called "Getting Naked". From this are the following principles that will hopefully develop into what I do as I transition into being a public speaker and author:
1) Consult don't sell
2) Give away the business
3) Tell the kind truth
4)Enter the danger
5)Ask dumb questions
6) Make dumb suggestions
7)Celebrate mistakes
8) Take a bullet for the client
9)Make everything about the client
10)Honor the client's work
11) Do the dirty work
The point is to live a life of transparency. I will be moving in this direction even more in the days and weeks to come. I realize that along the way that I will be offending some so I am carefully crafting my words to speak the truth in love. Essentially I see this nation that I love selling itself to the devil and as a result our nation is collapsing. I can not stand back and do nothing. Over the next several months I will be developing my plan and in God's timing I will do what I can to right this ship. Pray for wisdom on what to do and when. Thanks.
