Hero Quest Chapter 2 part 4

The clogged sink was waiting for him. After knocking, John stood back a few steps.  He smiled, holding the tools in his hands.  This was another opportunity to be a hero - that was, if he succeeded, and with these old pipes that was not a guarantee.  Most of the time with projects like this the only thing that was certain was that he would soon be on his way to the hardware store. The odds were that it would take more than one trip.  A bleary-eyed looking woman answered the door. “I heard you had a clogged sink.” 

“Yeah,” she said thickly. Slowly the woman stepped back.  Clothes were strewn about and toys cluttered the room.  Crusted food sat on a plate on the table, obviously from the night before.  The room was darkened except for some light coming through the glass in the bathroom where John was heading.  It was fairly obvious that the baby had recently loaded a diaper; at least he hoped it had been recently.  Suddenly coming to her senses, the woman in an apologetic voice said, “The baby was up all night.  I’m sorry for the mess.  I really meant to have this cleaned up by now.  I guess that I fell asleep after my daughter got off to school this morning.” 

“That’s ok.  I know that normally your room isn’t like this.” John stepped over a small pile of clothes and began dismantling the pipes under the sink.  “What’s wrong with Ethan?” 

“I don’t really know.  It seems that every single time that he and his sister have visits with daddy he doesn’t want to go to sleep.” 

“Court-ordered visits, I’m guessing?” 

“Yeah, I wouldn’t let that jerk anywhere near my baby.”  The woman began getting agitated just talking about it.  “Can you believe that they gave him visitation?” 

“I don’t really know him.”  John replied mildly.

“You would have read about him in the papers.  About ten years ago Tyler was put in jail for abusing a neighbor girl.”  Words began to flow out of her like water from a faucet. “He did his time and when he got out I met him at church.  He told me about what had happened and had me convinced that the little girl had made the whole thing up.  I mean, he told me that at church, so he couldn’t be lying, could he?”  She didn’t really pause to let John comment or answer, he listened as water poured out of the sink into the bucket.  “Doesn’t really matter, I guess, because I believed him.  Stupid me, I fell in love.   I was raised in the church and always wanted a Christian man.  We were waiting on his divorce to come through so that Tyler and I could be married.  It was taking a long time so we moved in together to save a few bucks.  That’s when Ethan came along.”  She seemed to run out of words.

John pulled a toothbrush out of the sink along with large globs of hair.  “I think I found the problem.  Do you want your toothbrush back or do you want a fresh one?  I can arrange that for you if you want.”  John smiled. 

Real Life at the Crisis Shelter May 7-13, 2012

Weekly highlights

Monday May 7:   A long lost guest returned to the shelter after a several month disappearance.  She has recently been in treatment and came to us directly from there.  She looked great and seems ready for life change.  One of our moms became aggressive using her therapy dog as a weapon when she did not get her way.  The mom was asked to leave on Tuesday morning.         

Tuesday May 8:    One of our singles had a positive breathalyzer and then admitted that she had been drinking during most of her stay at the shelter.   A young lady was dropped off at the administration wing of the mission while I was over there.  The young lady was very drunk.  I took her to the shelter and set her up to sleep it off for awhile.  Several times she woke up not knowing where she was and volunteers and staff were able to calm her and help her feel loved.  When she got to a point of detoxing where she had the shakes very bad, she opted to go to detox where they have medical help.  Late in the evening one of our guests threw a bag over the fence to her boyfriend.  When confronted by staff she became very aggressive.  The confrontation became so heated that the guest was asked to leave.  When she left the boyfriend and her began knocking on bathroom windows and making a racket.  Police were called but the guest and her boyfriend had left before the police arrived.   

Wednesday May 9:    A young lady checked in today who was working diligently to reunite with her daughter who was recently taken from her by Child Protective Services.  We made a few phone calls in order to help her make the contacts she needed since her actual CPS case was in Olympia.  I am confident that there is more to the story there, but I don’t know what it is.  She left on Thursday morning. 

Thursday May 10:    The young lady from Tuesday returned from Detox and is doing good.  She stated that she still feels awful and embarrassed but the change in her was incredible.  Guest assistants and Good Workers went to the UGM camp for a retreat.  Diane and Jackie did most of the planning of the event and are leading the ladies in a time of fun, relaxation and devotion.        

Friday May 11:  One of our guests decided that she wanted to sleep in another guest’s bed since the other guest was at the retreat.  We have had many discussions with this guest who not only wants a bottom bunk but one that does not have someone sleeping in the top bunk.  I explained to her that she can not take up two beds.  We had the conversation for three days and then let her know that overflow will always be a bottom bunk with no one above her and that would be her best option.  

Weekend:    The guest who had been here with the 25 year old son that we had accommodated several weeks ago went to the DV shelter from here.   I find this frustrating because she is taking a bed in the DV program that should be used by someone who is actually in a DV situation.  She had been safe here.

General comments:   The ladies were blessed on Mother’s Day through many different donors and a nice table dinner in the parking lot.  All of the ladies received gift bags, flowers and love from volunteers and staff.                

    

Current Crisis Shelter Purpose Statement:

 The Crisis Shelter for Women and Children exists to increase the impact of our ministries of rescue, recovery and restoration by partnering with staff, volunteers and donors.  We will do this by meeting basic needs in a safe, clean, temporary shelter, with instruction and guidance for life transformation in a healing environment.

My personal progres May 6-12, 2012

	Target	Actually Done
Leadership Bible	Be on page 665 (5 pg a day)	On page 666
Faith in Action Bible	Be on page 798 (6 pg a day)	On page 799
Message Read Through	7 Days youversion program	On track
Running	25 miles a week	10
Running 2012 Overall	1212 miles by 12/12/12	299.5
Crunches	1000 a week	1000
Floss	7 times a week	7 Days
Face Cleaning/Lotions	7 times a week	6
I Like Book	7 times a week	7
Modules	2 a week	1
Social Events	3 a quarter	4
Guy Time	10 X a quarter	3
Self Exam	3 a week	3
Book Reading	1 Book a week	1
Evening Prayer Meeting	26 times a year	11
Paid Speaking	3 a quarter	0
Date with Cara	3 a quarter	1
Date with Rachel	1 a quarter	0

This week I worked alot and lost momentum on my running.  Eventually I will need to really pick it up if I wish to reach my goals.  I also did a practice run on Heroic Conflict Resolution.  I will need to do some adjustments but I enjoyed doing it.  I also took Rachel to work with me this week.  Working along side of my daughter felt very rewarding.  She filmed portions of the Heroic Conflict Resolution class for me to add to my portfolio soon.  She is busy editing the video.
I continued to read more about conflict resolution this week but the book that I finished was a new book by Lencioni called "Getting Naked".  From this are the following principles that will hopefully develop into what I do as I transition into being a public speaker and author:
1) Consult don't sell
2) Give away the business
3) Tell the kind truth
4)Enter the danger
5)Ask dumb questions
6) Make dumb suggestions
7)Celebrate mistakes
8) Take a bullet for the client
9)Make everything about the client
10)Honor the client's work
11) Do the dirty work

The point is to live a life of transparency.  I will be moving in this direction even more in the days and weeks to come.  I realize that along the way that I will be offending some so I am carefully crafting my words to speak the truth in love.  Essentially I see this nation that I love selling itself to the devil and as a result our nation is collapsing.  I can not stand back and do nothing.  Over the next several months I will be developing my plan and in God's timing I will do what I can to right this ship.  Pray for wisdom on what to do and when.  Thanks.

Hero Quest Chapter 2 part 3

In the parking lot, the dumpster was being put back into position after being emptied.  The driver of that truck was amazing.  John remembered watching the driver maneuver between cars, snow banks and people last winter to put that dumpster right where it belonged.  With this many people at the shelter it was always a relief to have an empty dumpster.  Before the truck even got out of the parking lot the maintenance truck pulled in with the housekeeping team.  One of the guys jumped out when he saw John.  John directed them to rooms 16 and 17 so they could deep clean those rooms. 

While they were parking their van, he saw the truck from the Thrift Stores stopped on the busy street waiting for traffic to pass.  The Mission’s logo was plastered prominently on the sides of the truck for all to read.  The mission hoped to cultivate a community presence, to be familiar around town.  This also made him smile.  The work that the Mission was able to do was really only possible because of the generosity of this community. 

John’s smile widened as he watched the driver of the thrift store truck try to navigate on the busy street in front of the shelter.  There wasn’t much room to maneuver in the parking lot as he was attempting to back in.   Since the street was busy, he was using the parking lot across the street to get himself lined up for a straight shot into the shelter lot.  Four lanes of traffic stood between the driver and the shelter gate.  The problem was the business across the street was a brothel with a bikini espresso bar attached.  John wondered what donors would think if they saw the Mission’s truck in that vicinity.  He decided to help out and get that truck moving.  Cautiously, he moved out into traffic and stopped the cars.  The driver rocketed across the street, apparently eager to exit the vicinity of the bikini bar and all it represented. 

John realized that what he had just done was a picture of the job they had to do at the Shelter.  We help people get into a better position to launch them into a new life. This illuminating thought brought new life to John.  What an honor, he thought.

After welcoming the driver, Bob, he helped him load the donations into his truck.  As Bob pulled down the back door they insulted each other as only men who really like each other can, shook hands in farewell, and John returned to the duty of getting that clog fixed.   

     The basement smelled musty, but musty was one of the better smells at the Shelter.  At least this smell was predictable and that fact alone comforted him.  Strangely he walked past the work bench that housed the tools and simply walked around the basement.  His memory returned to a time when there really were no lights.  He had strung extension cords and lamps around this place.  It may not have been safe, but it had to be lit somehow. 

His eyes looked at the shelves of soap, shampoo and other toiletries that had all been donated. Somehow seeing the full shelves of toilet paper, feminine products and other assorted necessary items again spoke to him of a God who provides.  To most people these were just common items, but to those that were staying at the Shelter, most of whom had nothing, these items were priceless.  He smiled as he took time to speak a prayer of thanksgiving.  As he finished his loop of the basement, he grabbed the wrench, took a blue bucket to place under the pipe and began heading toward room five to open that drain. 

When he stepped out into the parking lot he noticed the donation truck was still there.  “That’s weird,” thought John.  He looked in the office.  Darlene was still talking with the lady she was with earlier.  No Bob.  John looked all around the parking lot and saw not one soul moving around.  As he moved down the sidewalk he could see Bob halfway under the hood, scratching his head. 

Bob gave a crooked smile. “Ah, you got jumper cables?  I left the lights on while we were talking.”  Again, Bob had brought a smile to John’s face.  Bob seemed to know this would be fodder for jokes for a long time but it couldn’t be helped.  John set down his tools.  He went to his little compact car, moved it into position and rooted around in the trunk for the jumper cables.  After attaching the cables, he looked at the enormity of the delivery truck next to his little car.  It looked like a mouse next to an elephant. His smile lines crinkled once more.  After a few moments the large truck was up and running.  Carefully, John pulled off the cables put them back into the trunk, moved his car out of the way, waving good-bye to Bob one more time. 

Real Life at the Crisis Shelter April 30-May 6, 2012

Weekly highlights

Monday April 30:  The developmentally delayed 25 year old man moved to stay with extended family in Ohio.  Mom was grieving but stayed with us.  She was very grateful for the exception.  One of our singles went on a second interview.  Some of our ladies are catching spring fever and are chasing men all over the place.  Staff have had many conversations about this addiction with them.  Most are open to discussion.         

Tuesday May 1:   Two of our singles are butting heads.  Both are very head strong so it has been interesting to work through the dispute with them.  Right now the conflict demonstrates itself in little nasty comments but this can quickly escalate so we are monitoring the situation closely.  One of our more anxiety driven guests almost moved out in a moment of frustration but then after conversation decided to stay.  We had to expand into another room to make room for singles.  One of our moms had her children taken by CPS today.  They were here waiting when she returned for the day.  Matters were complicated by the fact that she was running late.  CPS did a good job of keeping everyone calm during the situation.    One of our overflow guests was dropped off by the Spokane police who were surprised that we were willing to help her at all since they feel that she is a dangerous person, though they do not have enough evidence to take her in.  We agree based on past performance at the shelter, she has the overflow option only and that has low impact on the rest of the shelter.

Wednesday May 2:   One of our guests has been appearing angrier lately than is usual.  It looks to be relationship issues outside of the shelter.

Thursday May 3:    Pray for one of our consistent phase 2 guests.  She has lived a fairly rough life and has several illnesses that have resulted for her.       

Friday May 4:   One of our singles had been drinking.  The story is that her grandmother bought her the alcohol so that she would get kicked out and then have to move back in with her abuser.  I’m not sure if that true, but she was fairly drunk.  To compound matters she takes a lot of medication that does not work well with alcohol.  After she left (she was given the option of not drinking the rest of the day and then using our phase 2) she wandered the neighborhood and kept drinking until she passed out on East Sprague.  Paramedics were called and when they aroused her she became verbally abusive to them.  Since she had made some suicidal comments they took her in for evaluation.

Weekend:     Lots of “ah ha” moments for several of our ladies as they begin to understand that God has made them to be Royalty in the Kingdom of God.  Many conversations and classes are having an impact.  By the end of the weekend there were assorted dramas around the singles not getting along.  We are watching these situations carefully.

General comments:  This coming Thursday and Friday will be our first Guest Assistant/Good Worker retreat.  This will take place out at the camp and we are very excited over this event!                

    

Current Crisis Shelter Purpose Statement:

 The Crisis Shelter for Women and Children exists to increase the impact of our ministries of rescue, recovery and restoration by partnering with staff, volunteers and donors.  We will do this by meeting basic needs in a safe, clean, temporary shelter, with instruction and guidance for life transformation in a healing environment.

My personal progres April 29-May 5, 2012

	Target	Actually Done
Leadership Bible	Be on page 630 (5 pg a day)	On page 630
Faith in Action Bible	Be on page 756 (6 pg a day)	On page 756
Message Read Through	7 Days youversion program	On track
Running	25 miles a week	26
Running 2012 Overall	1212 miles by 12/12/12	289.5
Crunches	1000 a week	1100
Floss	7 times a week	7 Days
Face Cleaning/Lotions	7 times a week	7
I Like Book	7 times a week	7
Modules	2 a week	3
Social Events	3 a quarter	3
Guy Time	10 X a quarter	2
Self Exam	3 a week	3
Book Reading	1 Book a week	2
Evening Prayer Meeting	26 times a year	10
Paid Speaking	3 a quarter	0
Date with Cara	3 a quarter	1
Date with Rachel	1 a quarter	0

We all have people and things that come against us reaching our goals.  In my goal setting workshops and in my life change seminar I cover some ways to increase your odds of success.  One of those ways is to seek accountability.  That is why I post this each week.  So that you can see my progress and boo or cheer me depending on what I am doing.  More importantly I do not wish to disappoint, so I push myself to meet or exceed my own standards.
I long to live heroically.  I read a book this week called the Butterfly Effect.  It essentially points out that doing little things can cause huge chain reactions to the future that may very well change the world.  The other book that I read this week The Resolution for Men, is simply refocusing me toward becoming the man that I want to be.
The other push this week was having a semi informal marriage counseling session.  I long to be a heroic husband and father.  This desire often serves against me as my own disappointments can prevent others from being totally honest with me.  Basically, I am falling short but nobody tells me so I think that I am doing great!  How sad.  I long to be open, transparent and continue on with my drive to live heroically in all areas of my life.
Next week will be very busy. I pray that I will be able to push through the challanges and meet my own standards head on.

Hero Quest Chapter 2 part 2

“It seems that you just told me that you needed to go to the hospital right away.  You should be back by five.”  He didn’t know what was really going on, but he was going to stand by shelter policies.  They were there for good reasons. 

But, this woman couldn’t relate with those reasons just now.  If fact, she seemed to quiver with anger.  She said nothing and went to her room.  John shrugged and went toward the staff office.

            The decoration on the door jingled like a warning bell.  “How goes the battle?”  John greeted Darlene.

            She looked up from updating the computer.  “Wild and woolly, as always.”  He walked past her as she spoke and started warming up his computer.  He walked back out for the daily snapshot book.  Darlene gave him the to-do list.  “Room five has a clog in the bathroom sink.  I was taking the new gal around back to show her the back gate and the bell when I saw Sue smoking a doobie.” 

“Really.” 

“Yeah it’s really clogged.” 

“No, I meant…” 

Darlene cut him off with a smile, “I know, I know.  She was very apologetic.  She even apologized for disrespecting our guidelines, the shelter, and the mission as a whole.  Before she left she even confessed to being here high on other types of drugs.  Weird, isn’t it?” 

“There is hope for that one.  Go ahead and put her on the accountability list, if she comes back, she’ll have to pass our drug test.”  Darlene nodded as she moved to do so.  “Anything else of interest?” John asked.

“A few people are still shaken up from yesterday, but for the most part they are very angry with Sarah.  There was even talk among the ladies in room nine about taking her out, permanent like.” Darlene winced and shuffled some papers.

“They know that’s not ok, right?” 

“I hope so but they are fairly passionate about this,” she shook her head.

“Make sure they know that I do not want any revenge,” he enunciated firmly.

“I will.”  There was a knock on the door and John took the book back to his office. 

            Flipping the book open, he read Maggie’s account of last night’s events.  Most of these he was intimately familiar with, but there were some notes about the after effects.  Several of the ladies had asked for a special prayer meeting and one of the volunteers had not only joined them but led them.  Apparently the ladies from room nine were having their own kind of meeting, thought John. 

Maggie’s account really made him sound like a hero, but he really didn’t feel that way.  He got home the night before and was so out of it.  What did his kids think of him?  Was he a real man?  He had been crying half the evening.  He shook his head as if to shake off last night’s unpleasant events.

Three people had checked in the night before, and John updated the register in the computer.  In the other room, he heard Darlene talking with a guest who was wondering if it was okay to take a job at a near by strip club.  Darlene was trying to lovingly tell her that she was worth much more than they would be paying her.  The guest was trying to explain that all she had to offer the world was an incredible body.  John could hear the desperation in her voice and longed for her to see herself as God saw her; so much more than simply a sexual object.   Darlene explained that shelter policy would not be giving her a late exception for that sort of job.  Darlene encouraged her to get a job that was more in line with her real value.  He heard the urgency in Darlene’s tone, explaining to the guest that she was precious in the sight of God, created for much more than this.  As she talked about purpose and value and dignity, he prayed that Darlene’s seeds would find good soil in this heart. 

He returned to his work, checking emails, making a quick to-do list and prioritizing the assorted crisis situations presented at the Shelter.